Toni Lepeska
When a Parent Dies
As I tried to figure out how to put new life together after my parents’ death, I was tasked with figuring out what to do with their voluminous collection of cookbooks and recipes. It was Christmastime when I got to them. I’d held onto their home eight years, and I was still sorting not only …
How much should we focus on the progression of our grief? On whether we are “doing better”? The question came up this week when I received an email from a man who thought an associate was “stuck” in grief. He wanted assistance. He wanted the person to experience healing. A worthy desire. However, the person …
I grabbed an ear of fresh corn. Hovering over an open garbage can, I began to peel the husks off to reveal the sweet yellow gold inside. At that moment, my mind flashed to the image of my dad standing beside a little-girl me as we shucked ears of corn in the kitchen of my …
Have you ever suffered? A silly question, right? Haven’t we all suffered in some form? Perhaps not as much as others, but we have suffered. I found a poem years ago, and I want to share it with you today. It’s called A Creed For Those Who Have Suffered. I found a copy of it …
What if you could hear your deceased parent tell a story you’ve never heard? What if you could discover thoughts they’d never expressed? What if you could get perspective they never gave you in life? If a parent or another loved one left behind a diary or journal – or even letters or tales of …
Under the bowels of the dressing room sink, I discovered a half-completed painting, a sort of portrait of an unfinished life It wasn’t the last evidence I’d find of a life interrupted. Nor the last grief trigger to cross my path. I found Mom’s half-done crossword puzzles. Her hand-drawn plans for a circular driveway that …
Delegating what to do with what the dead leave behind is a common ritual for the living. And when it’s your own loved one? In each slip of a paper and garment is a memory. Or a smell. A joy followed by a grief. For some, the task is too painful. They assign the job …
What do you hold onto that makes you feel close to your deceased loved one? Is it a shirt with their smell? A love letter? Or maybe it’s not an object but a shared cause or creed you foster. Connection. We all seek it but in different ways. For a long time, I thought I …
Do you ever wonder which way to go? Which path is the best to take? Which decision will lead to happiness, healing and prosperity? I do. I am at the crossroads again. Once I pinpointed my location at the crossroads, I realized why I’d been feeling melancholy. Why I’d felt no spark. Why I seemed …
