Toni Lepeska
When a Parent Dies
I knew Mom would die, and I knew I couldn’t prevent it, but the one thing I asked God is that I’d be with her when she took her last breath. But I was not with her. This hurt as much as the fact that she was dead. I felt I had devastatingly failed her. …
The pandemic. The political tension. The demands of social distancing on a holiday designed for togetherness. I thought I'd republish last year's blog this Thanksgiving - because we all could use a refresher on being grateful when circumstances are pulling us apart.
Thanksgiving is the time of year we taste our grief. Literally. I mean, no one makes homemade cornbread dressing like Mom. But … she isn’t here anymore to make it. It cannot be the same … So, like any perfectly sentimental daughter, I always make dressing, aka, stuffing, in just the way Mom made dressing. …
I ordered four catfish filets, a handful of shrimp and a bag of ice, unaware that I would be transported from the Kroger fish counter across time and death. The moment happened when an employee awkwardly handed me the plastic bag of ice, open. I held the bag by its ends and twirled it. I …
I think of the pandemic as the time in between. It is the period after normal has ended but a new normal has yet to be established. It is the time life is still dizzingly out of control. I feel as if I’ve been holding my breath, waiting to resurface from the depths of a …
Maybe that’s the question you are asking today. “How can I go on?”
Despite the death of a parent or other loved one, there’s a mountain in front of us called life. How do we do it without him? How do we do it without her? Here are 4 first-steps to take, but first I want to tell you, I’ve been there.
Does Fall do to you what it does to me? Does it transport you to the past? Or maybe it inspires you to transform, to restyle your life like trees that tint their leaves. I wake, dress, grab my essentials and walk onto the carport. The breeze flutters through my hair. No more gummy sweat …
I passed the Barnes & Noble self-help section that featured books on capturing every sort of success. Get rich. Get peace. Get healthy. In five easy steps. Goals! The red ink screamed, catching my eye. The subtitled promised, How to Get Everything You Want – Faster Than You Ever Thought Possible. I wasn’t going to …
The drama unfolded at Memphis International Airport inside the compact Honda Civic I’d owned for seven years. I shut the door, and with the windows rolled up against the July heat, I opened my mouth and screamed. I screamed as loud as I had ever screamed. The man I loved, the one waiting for a …
